The Itsy-Bitsy Spider...

The other day I hear this shriek coming from the bathroom, so I run in to find Jack looking over the sink crying and yelling. I peek over the sink, well because I'm a little scared to see what he's looking at, and I see this tiny little spider crawling around the inside of the sink. Jack is just freaked! He just stood there, refusing to move, refusing to kill it. I told him, "Jack, you're bigger than that spider, it can't hurt you!" So I did what any mom would do, I turned on the water and drowned that spider! It was an easy task for me because I know that it was harmless and within seconds we could take down that spider. Jack, on the other hand, just couldn't see it for what it was. I don't know exactly what he was thinking, maybe he was afraid, perhaps he didn't know that he could kill it by turning on the water.. or maybe he just didn't want to do anything besides allow it to keep walking around the sink and letting it scare him. I, of course, was able to relate this to some areas in my own life. I spent many many years trying to battle my weight. I bought different books, tried different diets I even joined a workout facility at one point. But time after time, I seemed to fail. It wasn't until I realized that I was bigger than the battle I was fighting. You see, once you can see that, then the battle is much easier. We have allowed food to control our lives for so long that it has become this GIANT object in our lives and we just sit there and allow our food habits to consume us. I don't believe that food is the problem. I believe it's how we handle our food. It's the role we allow it to play in our lives. So many of us allow it to comfort us, allow it to be our entertainment when we're bored, allow it to be a part of every celebration we have. Some of us have allowed our eating habits to be like that spider, and just sorta stay in our lives because we're either afraid to change our habits, possibly due to being afraid of failure, or we really don't want too change. If you really want to change and you really want to finally conquer this mountain in your life, then I know you can! It's pushing through those moments that you feel like you're not going to be able to do it. Those are just thoughts, they aren't facts. The fact is, it's just a little spider that we've allowed to look like something bigger than what it really is. The fact is you really do have the ability to turn on the water and drown it! You have the ability to walk away from the dessert table if you need too. You have the ability to throw ice cream in the garbage if you need too. You really can get up from the dinner table and not have seconds or thirds or... It just takes you realizing you can do it! So here's my challenge to you.. Don't be like Jack. No longer stand there and allow these "little spiders" to consume your life. Drown those suckers!!! ;-) Stop allowing yourself to be defeated by your bad habits. I'm rooting for you!!!! I know you can do it!!! :)

Slow down and smell the chocolate fountain

As some of you may know this already, but I am an assistant wedding photographer, so I get to attend a lot of weddings. This past summer I got to shoot pictures for about 27 weddings. So yes, I've seen my share of cake! I happened to be at this particular wedding that had one of THOSE DELICIOUS looking chocolate fountains! Of course our table was located right next to this wonderful-flowing-fountain of chocolaty heaven! Not sure if you can tell or not, but I am a fan of chocolate :) Lucky for me, though, my Weight Watcher leader had just talked about chocolate fountains in one of classes prior to this wedding. Thankfully I listen in my class!! She said she had a member in one of her classes that worked at a banquet hall that offered a chocolate fountain and the majority of the "chocolate" is made up of vegetable oil to keep the "chocolate" oil flowing. So now it's chocolate oil. Not just chocolate. It was kinda disappointing to me. Honestly, in my life pre-weight loss I would've still eaten from that fountain. I would have heard the information, probably even said, "Oh man, that's terrible!" and then forgotten about it and still ate some anyways, just saying! I had decided I wasn't going to even try it. I didn't really want it unless it was straight chocolate. But something else happened, as the chocolate fountain started flowing I started to smell this odor, sort of like sweat. I am serious! Of course I had to investigate where this smell was coming from and I discovered the smell was coming from the chocolate fountain. I was shocked, "Why hadn't I smelled this before?!" And just so you know, I was at another wedding later on in the season that had a chocolate fountain and it smelled bad too. You know why I never smelled it before? Because I never slowed down to even smell what I was eating. Eating carelessly, not even thinking, that's how I used to eat. I saw something I wanted and ate it. I can't even remember paying too much attention to the nutrition labels. Can you relate to this at all? Shoving food in your mouth and barely even tasting it. Finding a balance in life is important. Eating food that you find to be delicious is perfectly fine! I am still a food lover! But being aware of what you're eating AND enjoying it, is important. So slow down, smell the chocolate fountain. Read what's in your food. Find out what you're eating before you put it in your mouth. And enjoy ;)

I'd like to make a deposit..

I don't know, maybe this is just how I'm "wired" but giving back brings me so much fulfillment. I remember walking in to my first WW meeting and thinking, "Ok, IF I can do this.. IF I can overcome this weight issue I've never been able to conquer, then I'm not only going to do this for myself but for those around me." It's just something I do, I try to make deposits into other people's lives. There is no point in doing something if you're not able to impact someone around you. During the beginning of my journey, I had to focus on myself first. I had to figure this weight loss thing out. I even tried to keep it a secret for the first 30 pounds, but that was mainly because I was afraid I'd fail and I didn't want to look like a failure in people's eyes (yep.. you're talking to a people pleaser here.. it's not a pretty sight) But slowly, those around me started to notice the changes in me and wanted to know what I was doing. So that's when I started to share and hope that those that needed it would grab a hold of whatever they needed from my experiences. I guess for me, it helps me in several areas. One, it helps me keep my eyes off of myself. I have walked through frustrating and discouraging times during this journey but knowing that others were counting on me to finish, it helped keep me going. When you're making deposits into other peoples lives, it sorta helps keep your eyes off of your own problems. It's also a great accountability! If someone is asking me for advice on what they should eat or how to keep going when they don't feel like it.. well I better be doing those things if I'm going to hope someone else will! I have the wonderful privilege of waking up in the mornings and opening up my FB messages to find people sharing with me their exciting news about their journeys. I get to talk to those that just need a little boost of encouragement or a little push to get them past a hurdle. I feel so lucky to be able to do this. I do believe we all can do this! And why not? This is such an amazing thing you're doing for your health, life and future.. and another persons health, life and future can be greatly impacted by you. I think even in our struggles we can help others. I want to encourage you, if you're having a hard time on your weight loss/getting healthy plan.. then try making some deposits into others. Find someone that might need a workout buddy and set a date to workout together. Maybe you'll find someone that just needs some encouragement. I know lots of people that simply need some cheerleaders on their side! You might not see that you've come far enough to help someone else, but just the fact that you're trying is good enough to help others! Make a deposit into someones life, expecting nothing in return except the satisfaction and joy knowing that you've helped someone else. Thank you to those that have allowed me to deposit into their lives. By you allowing that, you've helped me in so many ways! Keeping our eyes off of our own "ho hums" helps us not be so down about the things that might not be going our way. And as always, thanks for reading :)

If I want it.. I get it!

Have you ever been at the mall and saw something you just had to have? Maybe it was an outfit, a pair of shoes or a super awesome new TV?! I definitely have!! How convenient is it that you can purchase these things on borrowed money!! You can take out credit right then and there, if approved of course, and you don't have to wait. We have what we want and most of the time we get it when we want it. We don't wait and save, we spend money we don't have. I like to say, we can be over indulgers :) I think I just made that word up!! We really do have some out of control habits. We like to get what we want and we don't always think beyond that moment. Look at the economy, that explains our consequences to our spending habits.  So it should be no shock that two thirds of U.S. adults are overweight or obese. We lack this thing called self control. And it's literally killing us. Believe me, I have been there! I ate what I wanted, how much I wanted and when I wanted. If I wanted a a double cheeseburger...every day, I ate one... every day. I didn't think about the consequences to my actions. And I said I cared about the consequences, but apparently not enough to do anything about it. My little sister, Enam, recently asked me if losing weight was hard. I had to take a few minutes to think about this question (it was a really great question, Enam :) And really, the act of losing weight isn't hard. It's gaining and keeping the ability to have self control. I think when people think of "diet" they think, "UGH!!!! Now I can't have ANYTHING I want!! I have to give up ALLLLLL my favorite foods!!!" And that's not true at all!! We can have whatever we want. We don't have to give up our favorite foods at all!! I think the problem is that we can't have it all the time, every day, whenever we want it! Well you can but with that comes some unwanted consequences. What do we think will happen to our body if we don't take care of it? I have learned that the more you say no to something, the easier it gets. You build up a resistance to it and caving in is less likely. You learn your weaknesses. I'm not saying self control is easy.. it is quite the opposite, especially when you're just building that character trait. But I will tell you, the longer you keep it up the easier it gets! I often think about my kids and how I have changed their lives by changing mine. I want my kids to grow up with the ability to show self control. Not just in the area of food but in all areas. I think it's ok to over indulge, at times. But if we have a lifestyle where over indulging is an often habit, that's where the trouble comes in. I'm telling you, if you will build up the ability that you already have inside you to have self control.. if you stop caving in to every little tasty craving you have.. it will get easier. I want to encourage you, do not give up because you feel like it's too hard to tell yourself no. Don't cave in to that lack of self control you have. Think about what you're doing and the consequences that comes along with it. I am telling you, you will build a very important trait inside yourself that will come in handy for the rest of your life.


Self control is the ability to control one's emotions, behavior, and desires in order to obtain some reward, or avoid some punishment, later.

Remember When?

I was out for a run the other day and looked down at my feet. I noticed they were worn out and have holes in them. They are stained with dirt and only God knows what else. I love these shoes! I'm having a hard time parting with them because of the journey we've been on together. I remember when I used to buy running shoes and running in them was the last thing on my mind to do in those shoes. I purchased these shoes though with the intent on running the heck outta them! Do you ever think about that... Remember when? I think it's good to say to yourself, "Remember when I..." Remember when I never took the time to workout? Remember when I never got up off the park bench to play on the playground with my kids? Remember when I never said no to dessert? Remember when I couldn't get past 2 weeks of working towards losing weight? I do. It's so nice that it's just a memory! Wherever you're at in the process, it's nice to look back and see how far you've come. I remember the first time I turned on my first Jillian DVD to workout too. Oh my word! At one point we had to get into a plank position.. yeah, I couldn't. I would try and believe me, holding myself in that position was impossible. But after working at it and pushing myself, it's a cinch now! I don't say, "Oh yes! I can stop because I've come so far!" Nah, this is the point you just keep giving yourself opportunities to have "Remember Whens.." Maybe you've been working on this goal for a few weeks or maybe you've been living it as a lifestyle for a few years.. either way, I want to encourage you to look back and see how far you've come. And after you look back, set some new goals! Set some higher challenges for yourself. I can't tell you enough how strong and free I feel! This life is meant to be lived! Our running shoes are meant to be worn down!! Don't let this be another one of those times where you just quit. You don't want to have another, "Remember when I quit again." You really do have the ability to reach your goals!! Push yourself and don't quit!!

"I'm very determined and stubborn. There's a desire in me that makes me want to do more and more, and to do it right. Each one of us has a fire in our heart for something. It's our goal in life to find it and to keep it."
~Mary Lou Retton

Ready, Set, MAINTAIN!!!

If you're my friend you probably know that I have FINALLY hit my weight goal! Ahhh.. It feels great!! Seriously, it took me longer than I had originally hoped and expected. I figured it would take me about a year, 10 pounds a month seemed reasonable to me! But apparently, I needed longer. Now that I've gotten here and have taken a look back on the past few years (yes, it took me 2 years to get here) I now realize that 2 years to learn and adapt to a new lifestyle really is ok with me! It means a new lifestyle, longer life, healthier more active lives for my family and much more. I want this to stick. I NEVER want to go back to my old ways. The past few months I've been looking up articles and blogs on how to maintain. I've been talking to many that have lost weight and have kept it off. There are different laps in this race we call "weight loss" losing the weight being the first lap and now the lap of maintaining. I've heard and read about how it is easier losing the weight than maintaining. Now, I know I am just a beginner at maintaining, but I honestly don't know how it can be any harder than losing it. So of course, I have a plan :) It seems to me that there are a few key factors in maintaining. And I also believe that if you adapt these factors for losing, maintaining will be easier than what you might have read and heard. I believe the main key to live your weight loss out for a lifetime is to first lose weight or "diet" in a way you can live that way for the rest of your life. I am a huge fan of Weight Watchers, as I should be, but I don't believe it is the ONLY way to lose weight. I think the reason WW works is because it teaches you how to live it as a lifestyle. You are allowed to eat whatever you want (my favorite part of the program) and it teaches you portion control and overall healthy eating. I have found that my biggest prize hasn't been hitting my goal but it is learning all these things along the way. See, my biggest prize is that I'm going to be able to maintain this for the rest of my life. I believe staying connected to others, having accountability with people that have either walked with you through your weight loss or maybe have gone through what you've gone through. Continue to set goals, because let's face it.. when it's all said and done, it's up to you. So challenging yourself by setting small goals is a good way to keep you focused. How about setting some activity goals like running a 5K, 10K or something else. Setting a goal in, "I've kept my weight off for 6 months, now I'm going for 6 more months." I am a big believer in choosing a "diet" plan that works for you! If you are losing weight by drinking shakes, cutting out your favorite foods, or eating just grape fruit, you have to ask yourself, "Is this something I can do for the rest of my life?" If you're losing in a healthy way, a liveable way, you're learning how to maintain right now! It's not about how fast can you lose the weight (even though we all want it off like RIGHT NOW!!!) but it really comes down to giving yourself and your family the gift of a healthy life. I am so thankful for the process.. the long 2 year process! Those two years would've passed with or without me doing this.. so why not just do it?! I plan to continue to blog in the hopes that I can help others along the way. I just want to encourage you to never quit! However long it may take you, it's worth it! And give yourself the prize of doing it in a healthy liveable way. Don't cheat yourself out of letting the process become your lifestyle. It's not worth doing the work if you're not going to be able to maintain it. And allowing it to become your lifestyle is the greatest gift for maintaining. NEVER GIVE UP!!!!

"Live to eat, eat to live"

Live to eat.. this used to describe my way of life! Every activity I did, food was always present. I would plan my activities around what was going to be on the menu. Think about it, we go to a baseball game and before we even get there we are thinking about the hotdogs and nachos. We go to the movies and popcorn is on our mind! And don't even get me started on going to the fair.. it's all about the food! The food is the main event at all holidays and birthday parties! If a naturally thin person is reading this.. you might not understand this "live to eat" concept, but it is true! When I joined Weight Watchers my view started to change but it went to the other end of the spectrum..  "eat to live" I realized I was extreme on both sides. I went from thinking about what I was going to eat to being worried about what I was or wasn't going to eat. I wasn't really sad that I couldn't or wouldn't eat all my old foods.. but I would worry about what I put in my mouth. I was afraid it would make me gain weight and I didn't want that. I believe it's natural, though, for someone that has struggled with being overweight and have an obsession for food to then have an obsession on the other end of it. I think it's part of the process and one of the "inner" struggles you have to deal with in the process of getting healthy. You have to find a balance in it. The changes that take place inside are much more important than the changes on the outside. The outside changes are just a result of what has happened in your mind and habits. I am happy for the process. I am thankful for the ways it's changed me and the impact it's had on my life. Sometimes the process can be trying and difficult. You want to give up and walk away. But if you stick through it, it will change you forever! I have learned to have balance in my life in the area of my eating.. I no longer see food in one extreme or another. It is nice to be able to spend holidays not focusing on what I'm going to eat , but it's also nice planning for a beautiful night out in Chicago knowing I'm going to fill my belly with some delicious food! I have never felt more in control in this area and I know I've learned that in the process. So what do I say to end this post.. keep going :) The learning doesn't happen the second you hit your goal, the learning happens on your way to your goal. Learn to live in the process and be thankful for it!